It’s incredible the difference a year can make. At the beginning of last year, we had no idea where Jackson would be going to school in the fall, what our journey to inclusion would look like, or whether or not Jackson would even have the opportunity to participate in a general education classroom. Just thinking about kindergarten made my palms sweat and my heart race. I felt a constant sense of helplessness regarding our inclusion journey; regardless of how much we did, there was the possibility we would hear “no” and it wouldn’t be something we could change. I would remind myself, anything worth having isn’t easy. In my mind, it’s a simple equation, hard work + perseverance + passion= success. I knew that in the case of inclusion, there are many factors in play that were out of our control and that was the hardest part.
Looking back on last year, Jackson was unsure of his abilities. Today, he exudes a sense of confidence and seeks to do more things on his own. 2017 was a year of growth. Despite some ups and downs and bumps in the road, Jackson is exactly where he needs to be: at his home school, included. It seems there is always something new to learn or work with his school team to address, but we collaborate and find solutions together.
Best of all, Jackson is thriving! Of course, he has days where his participation is down or he says “all done” several times during the school day. There are still times when he and I feel overwhelmed. But each time he is a part of a classroom or school activity that I know he wouldn’t have the opportunity to participate in otherwise, my heart fills with joy. Those are the moments Jackson enjoys the most; being a part of the school community.
We took a huge leap of faith. We listened to our guts and what Jackson had been showing us his whole life; he loves to be a part of the action. He wants to be involved. He won’t choose to be challenged but when he is, he rises to the occasion every time.
THE MAGIC INGREDIENT FOR SUCCESS
Prior to this year, we haven’t been able to put our finger on exactly what it is that makes Jackson work so hard for some people and refuse to do anything for others. We finally realized the magic ingredient that a person must possess to motivate Jackson to give his best. I can’t believe we didn’t realize it before, it was always right there in front of us the whole time: BELIEF. Anybody working with Jackson must BELIEVE in him, BELIEVE in what he can achieve and BELIEVE that he will accomplish his goals.
We are fortunate to have a team of people around Jackson that do believe in the world of possibilities that exists for him. Every day, they challenge him because they know he can do it! All that BELIEF has rubbed off on Jackson and he has started to believe more in himself. As a result, his confidence, independence, and abilities have soared. In 2018, I resolve to continue to push those boundaries for Jackson. We will more fully engage with his school family. I will stop thinking about what is out of my control and look for ways to best handle what is in our control.
Last year, I was told that I couldn’t do it alone. Basically, that I wasn’t the best advocate for my own son and that I needed to hire a formal “advocate.” Initially, those words scared me, but then they motivated me.
Through the course this year, I have realized that with additional education, the help of other parents in the Down syndrome community, research, time, dedication and a collaborative approach, I am the best advocate for Jackson. I needed to BELIEVE in myself. I have always believed in Jackson but in order to be the best mom (and advocate for him), I had to believe in myself.
And, I BELIEVE in each of you to be the best advocates for your child (until they become their own best advocates, self-advocates are the BEST!) We know our kids best and we know what they need. That’s our superpower. We can do this!
Here’s to a Happy, healthy New Year for all filled with more inclusion, goals achieved and collaboration!